i shared last week wonderful and exciting news about our new nephew that was soon to be adopted by my brother and sister-in-law. after being there for his birth, feeding him the very first time, holding him, changing him and simply falling in love with him they came home without him. the birth mother changed her mind before her discharge time and tod & catherine were left devastated. our whole family is so sad. with the loss of baby zach came the loss of many dreams.
i remember a similar feeling of loss and devastatment that came when our son, ollie, died four years ago. to trust God is to "have a resolute faith and confidence in His ability to work every circumstance that comes into our lives for our good and his glory." Jeremiah 29:11 says "for i know the plans i have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future." the essence of trusting God is confidence in this promise.
all of these things are exactly true but never can we grasp them until we have no other choices before us. i remember talking with my sister shortly after ollie's funeral hoping that she could say just the right thing to make me feel even slightly better. towards the end of our conversation she told me, "mandy, you have to take all of this to Jesus' feet and tell him all that you are thinking and feeling." i hung up that phone and thought "that was not what you were suppose to say. you were suppose to make me feel better." i turned away from my desk and began to cry, then weep and then fall on my knees- face to the floor crying out to Him who could comfort me- the Lord my God. that moment and those that followed changed my understanding of God's sovereignty- His trustworthiness.
pray for catherine and tod that they might find rest in their Lord. pray that their hearts would be softened, not hardened in the midst of their grief. pray that their lives would continue to be a testimony of God's goodness and His love.
Blessed are those who trust in the Lord and have made the Lord their hope and confidence. They are like trees planted along a riverbank, with roots that reach deep into the water. Such trees are not bothered by the heat or worried by long months of drought. Their leaves stay green, and they go right on producing delicious fruit. -Jeremiah 17:7-8