Christmas Time

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

still processing...

i have been reading a blog that is really challenging me. let me give you the back story...

the other night for some reason or another i got real snippy with ross and well...i was just not nice. so while i was pouting i was surfing on my computer and came across a blog through a friend's sister's blog. the lady writing is from texas (God's country) and is a wife and mom to four boys. she is a christian and her heart is for teaching younger women (titus 2).

as i began reading i felt like i had been whacked upside the head! here are few of the thoughts and scriptures i have been meditating on in the last 36 hours...

proverbs 14:1 says, "the wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down."

* i want to be a wise woman. i want to build not tear down. what do my children see and learn from me? is it peace or anger (proverbs 22:24-26)?

1 thessalonians 5:16-18 says, "be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."

* these things do not come naturally to me. this is God's will for me...scripture tells me that. i want to respond to life this way. when i am dead and gone this is the legacy i want to have left for my children and grandchildren. even before i die i want to experience they joy and peace that come with being right in the center of God's will.

2 corinthians 12:9 says, "but he [Christ] said to me, "my grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in your weakness.""

i confess that all too often i lose sight of Him in my struggle. i have struggled in my life...not just little struggles but, what to the average man or woman would be, pretty big ones. i have lost babies, i have watched my son on a ventilator, i have grieved the death of another son, i have known what it is to have a husband lose his job, i have been without money for bills, i have moved when i didn't want to. Christ has met me in those horrible times in such ways that i cannot understand why i lose sight of Him in the daily grind so often. i am flawed and yet Christ's power is perfected in those moments!

my desire is to bring glory to God in all i do! what does that mean? it means i want to bring Him fame. i want to make Him famous to my children and their friends, to my family and friends and to my neighbors. i want to love God, which is to obey his Word, and love my neighbor as myself. am i being changed into the likeness of Christ? would those who knew me 10 years ago see Christ in me? would i be making Him famous because of what He has done or would i be trying to make myself famous?

Lord, thank you for being what i am not. since the beginning you have been all i need. you gave me value when you knit me together in my mother's womb. i confess that i try to build my house on my own even though i know that is not wise. Lord, search me and try me. see all the offensive ways in me and cleanse my heart. teach me and lead me in the way everlasting. thank you for loving me, a sinner, and giving your life for mine. You, and You alone, are worthy of all my praise!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

that is so awesome, isn't it amazing the way god chooses to speak to us sometimes?
Jen

Aust Family said...

i feel like we are living parallel lives! this post sure hit home with me. how crazy that it has been, like, 10 years...maybe even longer than that, and i feel so connected to ms. mandy! we will definitely need to re-connect next time you are in houston. we have so much to share...years worth! i know God has a plan in our communicating...we have so much in common to share and compare.